"Adventures of Huckleberry Finn"
by Mark Twain

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     He stirred up in a kind of a startlish way; but when he see it was only me he took a good gap and stretch, and then he says:

     "Hello, what's up? Don't cry, bub. What's the trouble?"

     I says:

     "Pap, and mam, and sis, and--"

     Then I broke down. He says:

     "Oh, dang it now, DON'T take on so; we all has to have our troubles, and this 'n 'll come out all right. What's the matter with 'em?"

     "They're--they're--are you the watchman of the boat?"


     "Yes," he says, kind of pretty-well-satisfied like. "I'm the captain and the owner and the mate and the pilot and watchman and head deck-hand; and sometimes I'm the freight and passengers. I ain't as rich as old Jim Hornback, and I can't be so blame' generous and good to Tom, Dick, and Harry as what he is, and slam around money the way he does; but I've told him a many a time 't I wouldn't trade places with him; for, says I, a sailor's life's the life for me, and I'm derned if I'D live two mile out o' town, where there ain't nothing ever goin' on, not for all his spondulicks and as much more on top of it. Says I--"

     I broke in and says:

     "They're in an awful peck of trouble, and--"

     "WHO is?"

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